News You Can Bruise for 2000 February 8

Tue Feb 08 2000 07:18: I got this joke as a fortune and I'm not sure whether I don't get the joke or whether I get it but it's not a good joke. Here is the joke rum:

Q:     What does a WASP Mom make for dinner?
A:      A crisp salad, a hearty soup, a lovely entree, followed by
        a delicious dessert.

Send me your interpretations of the joke. It's a joke interpretation circus! Festival. Contest. Colloquium.

Tue Feb 08 2000 07:38: Jake sez: extra extra. duchamp rocks like a sly fox. Mom, Steven Jay Gould co-wrote these articles.

Tue Feb 08 2000 07:39: I was adressing that last sentence to my mother. My mother did not write those articles with Steven Jay Gould.

Tue Feb 08 2000 16:21: In the lounge today, we were generalizing Mr. T. From "I pity the foo!" we get "There exists an x such that I pity the x!" That's basically the joke. There were a couple other jokes but they all reduce to that one.

Speaking of jokes, I've recieved three interpretations of the WASP joke. Mike's is probably the right interpretation, although it means that putting the joke into written form can only confuse. We're still manning the phones to take your joke interpretations.

Tue Feb 08 2000 17:09: Gdancer got updated. It's a lot smoother now. I can now recommend it. Get it. It still depends on the song, though.

I think the reason there are so many MP3 players is that there is a contest among programmers to come up with the worst conceivable graphical user interface, and MP3 players are the field of battle.

Tue Feb 08 2000 17:11: Dan says that the same thing that goes for MP3 players goes for window manager themes. So it looks like the graphic designers are in on this contest as well.

Tue Feb 08 2000 17:21: I made a graphic for Mike on Mike's suggestion that Be CEO Jean-Louis Gassé wear a T-shirt bearing the "forward-looking statements" disclaimer Gassé must place after every utterance (lest he run afoul of the SEC). Mike turned the suggestion into a story and used my graphic, despite the fact that the lines of text on the graphic don't line up, because I'm a lazy bum. The T-shirt comes from copyleft's picture of a Segfault T-shirt.

Tue Feb 08 2000 20:56: I am grooving on Kris' latest single, No Alternative. It's a great song, even though it inevitably recalls the compilation disk of the same name (circa 1993) which had a decent Pavement song (I think it was Pavement) and the hard-rockin' Verse Chorus Verse and everything else on it sucked.