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[Comments] (6) The Pizza In Little Rock Is No Good:

DRAMATIS PERSONAE

ACT I
SCENE I

[The scene: a pizza store.]

Proprietor: Good morrow to you, sir!
Customer: The same to you, sir.
Prop.: Welcome to my quality pizza-serving establishment. How may I assist you?
Cust.: Your finest "pizza", if you would.
Prop.: Certainly.

ACT I
SCENE II

[The same store, later. CUSTOMER is seated.]

Proprietor: All right, who has the nachos?
Customer: Nachos? You must have misheard me. I ordered a pizza!
Prop.: Pizza? You must mean "nachos with tomato sauce and pizza toppings".
Cust.: I shall never dine here again! [Arise and exit.]
Prop.: [Calling out] Good luck with the take-out pizza you're planning to get instead! It has the same crappy crust!

Disclaimer: I have not yet eaten at Damgoode Pies (sic), so there might still be hope for pizza in Little Rock.

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Comments:

Posted by Kristofer Straub at Mon Nov 24 2003 18:36

Was it, then, an ultra-thin, shattered crust pizza, or literally a plate of tortilla chips with pizza fixins?* Either way I hate thin crust. I want rich breads.

* I left out the apostrophe because I wasn't comfortable with it. "Fixin's?"

Posted by Nick Moffitt at Mon Nov 24 2003 19:17

Ha ha Arkansas.

Posted by Frances Whitney at Tue Nov 25 2003 00:16

No Bisquik allowed, eh Kris?

Posted by Brendan at Tue Nov 25 2003 17:22

Fixins'.

Fix'ins.

F'ix!-ïNZ.

Posted by Leonard at Tue Dec 02 2003 12:03

The crust was very thin and crunchy, like matzah crackers. I've had pizza in Bakersfield with the same awful crust, but in Little Rock it is the default crust. That plus the lousy cheese gives the experience of eating a big nacho.

My untested hypothesis is that if you ask for "incredibly thick crust" in Little Rock you will get something like a normal crust pizza. Jake also emailed me and said a friend of his from Little Rock has moved back there to clean up the pizza scene.


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