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: UCLA is operating under the dual misimpression that:

  1. My mother lives with me in my apartment.
  2. My mother has a lot of money which she is just aching to spend on class rings for me and various foundations.

At some point I'll tell you about the Henry Samueli School of Engineering and Applied Sciences (couldn't they have changed the name after I graduated?) letter they sent to my mother at my address.

Oh, and look at this hilarious non sequitur from the class ring propaganda booklet:

After all, tradition isn't just about what each student receives from UCLA - it's about what they leave behind. As upcoming graduates take a particular joy in putting on the enduring symbol of a revered university, this university finds an equal joy in the caliber of those people who will be wearing a UCLA ring for many years to come.

I'm sure that made more sense in the original Russian.

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