How much is it worth to you? Just kidding. Here's the theme.
[theme: Mozart, Symphony No. 24]
Hello there, I'm Peter Schickele, and this is Schickele Mix, a program dedicated to the proposition that all musics are created equal. Or as Duke Ellington put it, if it sounds good, it is good. And the bills for this cavalcade of goodness are paid by the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, by the National Endowment for the Arts, and by this indispensable radio station to which you are listening. And folks, do you know what the call letters of this station are?
The call letters of this station are Y.O.U. The largest single source of income for this station is your contributions. Without your support, the call letters of this station would be D.O.D.O. So please, if you haven't already, become a member now so that I can keep on grinding out Schickele Mix shows, which are distributed, by the way, by PRI, Public Radio International.
And I have a particular reason for encouraging your contributions now because I want to start a brand new Schickele Mix service, a service it seems to me that is long overdue. You know, we have some good times here on this show, at least I know I do and I hope you do too, but let's face it, the bottom line is education. I mean, what's the point of having a good time if you don't know what a double fugue is, right?
But there are some things that are hard to explain on the radio. I often wish, for instance, that you could see my hands as I demonstrate something at the authentic instrument. Or that I could show you an illustration from a book so that you would know what Beethoven's walking stick really looked like. So with the help of your contributions, I'm starting a new service called Schickele Mix Home Delivery. If there's anything you don't understand on the show, just write me a letter.
I will select the neediest cases and visit those people in their own homes. And I won't leave until every one of their questions have been answered. Just think of what the Schickele Mix Home Delivery service could mean to you. I got a letter just yesterday. Let me read it to you.
It's from a woman named Claire. She says, Dear Mr. Mix, I'm studying to become a singer, but I've been told that I couldn't carry a tune in a wheelbarrow, so I've decided to be a voice teacher instead. What are the most important things to tell young singers? Well, Claire, the answer to that is IRID. That's right, IRID. I-R-I-D. Intonation, repertoire, identification, and diction.
Now, to a certain extent, I can illustrate these points with recordings. In fact, with recordings we've used on Schickele Mix. Here, for instance, is a compelling demonstration of the importance of intonation.
[music: Mozart, "Queen of the Night Aria" (The Glory (????) of the Human Voice); Florence Foster Jenkins]
Florence Foster Jenkins singing the Queen of the Night aria from Mozart's The Magic Flute. You just point out to your students, Claire, that Miss Jenkins' extraordinary sense of intonation landed her a record deal with the prestigious RCA label, and I think you'll find those students scurrying home to practice. But repertoire is also an important consideration for singers.
Just as Kathleen Battle would be ill-advised to sing the title role in Boris Godunov, so should you guide a basso profundo away from roles like Cherubino or even the Rhinemaidens. Of course, the wise teacher will recognize that sometimes a student wants to sing something so desperately that it's best to let him go ahead and get it out of his system.
[music: Rodgers/Hart, "Blue Moon" (Self Portrait); Bob Dylan]
Bob Dylan's interpretation of Blue Moon. But perhaps the most important thing you can teach your singing students, Claire, is identification. Becoming one with the character being played. Start simply. Typecasting is not necessarily a bad idea with young singers whose limited acting skills may not enable them to inhabit the roles of certain characters.
I would think twice, for instance, before suggesting the role of Sweeney Todd to a vegetarian. And a student who is active in the disarmament movement might not be comfortable as William Tell. In the presence of a truly great actor of course, singing becomes almost irrelevant.
[music: Dylan, "Mr. Tambourine Man" (Golden Throats); William Shatner]
Mr. Tambourine Man, Mr. Tambourine Man to you, as brought to life by William Shatner, who for a few precious minutes transports himself and us out of Captain Kirk's body and into that of a homeless vagabond. We'll talk about diction in a moment, but first, let's go back to the letter that Claire sent me. She writes, My first voice student will arrive next week, and there are so many things I would ask you, dear mentor. Yes, I feel as if I know you, since Schickele Mix is and has been for years the one absolutely unchangeable thing in my schedule.
I am a 25-year-old blonde, 5'4 1⁄2", and I, well, we don't have to read this whole letter, but folks, I think that you can see how valuable the Schickele Mix home delivery service would be in this case. There are things like posture and diaphragm control that can only be properly demonstrated in person.
Please make a contribution now. Your dollars will not only help this station, they will help make Schickele Mix home delivery a reality. Here's someone to tell you how to become a member.
And we're discussing a letter from Claire, who is about to start a career as a voice teacher and who wrote to me for advice. I've been illustrating my points with recordings from the Schickele Mix Library because, well, I hope I won't be accused of immodesty if I say that Schickele Mix is the greatest educational tool since Gutenberg paved the way for Cliff Notes.
Now, Claire, just as important as intonation is diction. If a singer's audience can't understand the words, they might as well be listening to a saxophone. Here's an example of a beautiful and profound song, whose profundity, however, is undercut by the sloppy diction of the singers. Part of the text of this choral selection, let me read this here, is, uh, "The world is very, very large, and butter is better than marge, and love is better than hate. The world is very, very big, and bacon comes from a pig, but it's you I really want on my plate."
That's very moving, and very fundamental too, the way it implicitly equates eating with loving, perhaps the two most basic human activities. The lyrics of this work belie its title, Meaningless Songs in Very High Voices, but you really have to concentrate to catch those lyrics.
[music: Pope, "Meaningless Songs" (439 Golden Greats); The Original HeeBeeGeeBees]
The HeeBeeGeeBees singing Meaningless Songs. Now, when it comes to diction, this next selection is really unforgivable. The singer manages to project the first verse fairly well, but after that, his diction is so bad that he might as well be singing in a foreign language.
[music: Axton, "Heartbreak Hotel" (in Japanese); unknown singer]
Heartbreak Hotel, sung by an unknown singer whose diction is even worse than Elvis Presley's was. Now I was quite taken aback when I first heard this next number but you know in this case I have a strong suspicion that it actually is in a foreign language.
One of the Fool's songs, believe it or not, from Shostakovich's incidental music for King Lear. Don't ask, I don't know. Now Claire, about this next song. If you ever have a singing student whose enunciation is this bad, I suggest that you don't waste any time on him. Urge him to give up music, or at least switch to some instrument, such as the trumpet.
[music: Terry, "Incoherent Blues"; Clark Terry, vocal/Oscar Peterson Trio]
Clark Terry singing the Incoherent Blues, backed up by the Oscar Peterson Trio. Well, it's aptly named, I'll say that. Claire, I hope that sometime very soon I'll be able to visit you in person to show you, for instance, how to hold your mouth for proper diction and what the best breathing exercises are. In the meantime, folks, please become a member of this station and do it now. And not just to get the Schickele Mix home delivery program going so I can tutor Claire in Hawaii, and hey, the fact that she lives on Maui has nothing to do with it. We're talking about education here.
But really friends, in these precarious times, with governmental support for public radio on the decline, and more and more arts organizations going to the same corporations for support, what it comes down to is you, Y-O-U. And you don't have to give a million bucks either. A hundred thousand will do.
Just kidding, folks, $10 will help. Because every single little itsy bitsy teeny weeny dollar helps. If you enjoy sitting on the barge of public radio, don't let everybody else be the Volga boatman. Please do your share of pushing and pulling. If that far-fetched metaphor arouses your latent sense of duty, here's somebody to tell you what to do to do your duty. Besides, I've never been to Maui.