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[Comments] (3) Revenge of the Couch Potatoes: So I don't ask for much in life. I enjoy sipping hot wassail and watching "The Amazing Race" on Tuesday nights. Susie and I had borrowed Elf from my sister-in-law, and decided we would watch that until 8, and then switch over to our much anticipated reality show.

Except the show was ENDING when we tunred the movie off. Apparently it was moved up an hour to make way for a bunch of Elvis impersonators to sing Christmas carols. The Chinese have the only phrase that adequately portarys my emotions at such a time as this: "GAUCHOA!" These really are the times that try men's souls.

The most infurating aspect of it all was that I missed it for Elf. All I heard from everyone was how funny this show was, and how well Will Farrell did in his debut movie. I don't know who could possibly find his humor funny, excepting some eight year-old who has yet to be exposed to Home Alone or The Three Stooges before. Honestly, the humor was trite, predictable, and way overdone. I didn't laugh the first time Will got hit by a taxi, nor did I laugh the six other times it happened. I didn't laugh when he beat up the "fake" Santa, nor did I laugh when he pulled down his tights in front of his father's wife. I saw every joke coming a mile away, and saw every plot set-up's ensuing ending about 40 minutes into this "show." Give me the good old humor of Ralphie and his Christmas Story anyday. The kid getting his tongue stuck to the pole; now that's comedy!

Now a few words to my favorite Hindu, Sumana: I was saddened that you will be unable to come to Zion next week and bask in her glory. You'll miss Temple Square, cold, inversions without snow, a Christmas present I wrapped myself for you, peppermint bark, and more. But I understand your plight. Customer service. Been there; suffered through that. I did my time for eight months until I was promoted to accounting. Now in my new job, I sit next to the customer service peeps. They bicker and scream and backbite their cohorts who don't take as many calls as they do in a day, work long hours (and holidays), and no one says "Thank You" often enough. My only bit of advice is that you initiate a career move as soon as is humanly possible. I also hope that you make it here before we skidaddle next year.

In closing, Christmas Eve movie this year (now that LOTR is over and Middle Earth is saved) is A Series of Unfortunate Events. I am really getting excited, and am almost done with the eleventh book! And we already have next year's movie picked out: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, hitting theaters December 2005. In an effort to be PC, I will close with a simple Happy Holidays!


© 2003-2015 John Chadwick.