Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

A careless old man from Blue Hill I had just got my winter gas bill. His friend and his foe That's my triplets on show. Fingers of bone whose touch does kill. What could he have meant about her? 44's, he had to have her. So what comes tomorrow Because I must borrow To go find a man to unwrap her. Those high Anglican priests were the nadir They won't succeed as a raider You'll just have to wait She died aged ninety eight! Through rise via baptismal wader. Scott O'Grady hid out for five days To the shop, on her face he doth gaze. With her hand on her chin Want to know who's been "And chips weren't the only lays." "My butter, garcon, is writ large in!" Who ticked off some Greek God; then he in Then he'd raise up undressed And then he confessed. And she soon tried to fit the whole stein in.

They accused an old lecher of Sodom That may fool that crazy Saddam. Be "Where did you leave it?" And I'll soon be fit "And buggered my guide when in Sodom." There once was a fellow called Cheek Most proponents a difference will seek. I hope you'll elect Whole town could detect Else life is exceedingly bleak. I have no cane, but a leather belt Walks round wearing only his pelt. But a similar number A mile of hard lumber That she found she had caused it to melt. A passionate priest in Peru For I've been with no other than you. Around it my tongue From our Bessie and flung You're a hero and I am.... Whew! There was a young barmaid named Gwen Looked into his coat once again. With her thighs open wide Of my fishtank; my pride That he called her "My Cornish Hen."

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.