Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

"Were your services worth the amount" Said her friend, "Pray try to surmount" And often bemoans So when walking, his bones He's once again learning to count! Now all you can come 'round and watch! Likes to whittle and spit and drink scotch. And left salve for the itches To put in your britches. And sucked it up with her crotch. And I wouldn't go blaming no horse It's best to avoid using force. But he cried in despair On a cane-bottomed chair Else use a chainsaw, of course. Everything's quiet and then I performed an act, but won't again. Yet few floors remain The source of my pain. A demeanor just like Gentle Ben. Why Archie, of course it is yours! Of Morocco, the land of the Moors. It seemed that she liked The way that they spiked To Morocco. Here, punk, some brochures.

My respect for king's English is tops. Who couldn't hold on to his props. But to ward off the jeers So he never hears Bill Bennett and his Keystone Cops. But didn't you hear bald is in? Take stock about what shape you're in. He came back with an ape He managed the rape He'd not finished coloring them in. A man, and a horse, and two girls! With enough meat to well part my curls. And his aim when he fired But more is desired But their hobby's muff diving for pearls. On all moral guardians, a pox! And at breaktime they display their cocks. Where chills, thrills and bliss We know that you'll miss When mad Mother Nature, Man mocks. "It ain't you, you warty old hog!" Who lived most of his life in a bog. If what Starr knows Are for posing one's hose And picked up and kissed that damn frog.

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.