News You Can Bruise for 1999 May 25

Hm, AIR wants the descendants of famous scientists and inventors to go on stage at this year's Ig Nobels. I am a descendant of Eli Whitney, and as such would probably qualify for the "Flaunt Your Genome" event. The only problem is that I'd miss some of the first week of class next quarter. And I'd have to pay for tickets.

Eli Whitney invented the cotton gin, silly. Everybody knows that. More people know that than know what a cotton gin is.