News You Can Bruise for 1999 July 9

There was one Berliner Ensemble ticket left. It was way in the back. It was not a student ticket. It cost $49. There is no way I'm paying $49 for a damn theater ticket.

Twelve Mace Windus take their place in my fridge alongside the four remaining Jar Jars. I don't normally go through eight cans of Mountain Dew in a week, but when it's on sale, it's on sale.

By the way, no one, under any circumstances, should ever use the phrase "roving tongue".