News You Can Bruise for 2000 May 21

There is someone in the building across from my building who has two techno albums. They've been playing both of these albums every day since the start of school. The intervening distance and walls cut out most of the treble and midrange, making the songs sound even more like each other than your average techno song sounds like your average other techno song. I think that sometimes they repeat a track they really like, but I'm not sure. It might be a different song.

I swiped Dan's headphones (he's asleep) and put on the Mass in B Minor, but I can still hear that annoying techno drum machine. I curse the guy who invented the drum machine (forgot his name). It doesn't take much skill to play the drums (I speak from experience), but even the modicum of talent required to do so would be enough of a barrier to entry to prevent much techno music from being produced. Jumping frogs? I must avoid this technology!

Jake is going to come to the defense of the drum machine in an impassioned plea, I just know it. Celeste too, probably.