Mysterious Attacks by Chocolate-Wielding Madman

By boy reporter David Griffith

A mysterious man calling himself "The Theobrominator" is terrorizing the residents of Bunnyranch, California with bizarre assaults and acts of vandalism.

Hazel Rodding recounts being visited at her ice cream shop three weeks ago by a tall, dark, humanoid figure who smelled strongly of chocolate. The man asked if the shop had any chocolate ice cream. When Hazel replied that she had run out earlier in the day, the man hurled nearly two hundred gallons of what appeared to be melted chocolate all over the shop.

Two days later, this man confronted two officers, declared "I am the Theobrominator!", and buried them underneath a pile of chocolate-frosted donuts. The madman was fired on by three bystanders with apparently no effect. In the past week, three more similar attacks have been perpetrated.

Police Commander George Graham believes there may be a connection between this "Theobrominator" and the Mr. Stay Puft incident of the mid 1980s in New York City.

This document is part of Crummy, the webspace of Leonard Richardson (contact information). It was last modified on Tuesday, April 13 2004, 04:17:22 Nowhere Standard Time and last built on Friday, June 02 2023, 11:00:02 Nowhere Standard Time.

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