Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

A coke sniffing dork from Atlanta Had a hot Christmas Eve with old Santa. But the one I like best That he finally digressed And slid on it into Atlanta. Descartes woke one night and said, "Damn!" So sip Maneschewitz, a dram. Then we slept in the straw And annul the law. And she show him her bearded clam. A fellow named Steve gave a shout! Was having a fine fucking bout. If anyone here But with brain on, you hear Who figure they'd better stay out. The result is a great imperfection Why I sliced off my husband's erection. He believed hard that come Of the lecherous scum And since then, she enjoyed his protection. I once knew a girl called October. But I am willing to be sober That a year out at sea "Have a net under me." We hump throughout sober October.

Goliath was killed by the rock I see that you're eyeing the clock. His girl gives him head And drank six Watney's Red She settled for some granite block. A teller employed at a bank A religious fanatic, first rank. For their favorite son As he gets off his gun Of goldfish beside them, and drank. This stuff is a nightmare of crap. I shouldn't be taking this rap! Of leaves falling to earth Except there's a dearth For whatever that I might unwrap. In Baghdad I met a glad bag lad. The name of the person who had She said, "Don't be silly..." But alas, old slick Willie "It plays a bit tighter a tad." When a newbie has browsed through the list Saddam will be gone, I insist. Said President Reagan That he tried to kill Reagan The result of testicular twist.

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.