Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

We've all heard of Little Jack Horner Who played with his plums in the corner. She parted her ass More abdominal gas Boasting "Good for a spot on Time-Warner." There was an old Bishop of Mounds It is art, or maybe the sounds They all said, "Hooray" It's really O.K. Not true! 'Twas a boff with Tess Rounds. A recruit in the battle of Aix The Y chromosome changed to an X. She preferred not to spar Those dear Scots won't get far Equivalent to having sex! To the doc went a fellow named Jock For his neck was as stiff as a rock. So the Northerner's claim "Come on, play this game." And each time it chimed -- what a shock! In my pool, seven swans all a-swimming... My filter all clogged from poop-skimming! This gross impropriety I crave some variety. With avian shit, my life's brimming!

Don't throw out those "houses of glass" They may lack some breeding or class. They started to test So why get so stressed? He said, "I hope HIV doesn't pass." Now I propose a new plan Be the president, so he's my man. Rap noise I can't bear That is mean and unfair. But the doc just prescribed him some bran. With breakfast in bed, a TV And then we'll determine the fee. While in back, he would bugger With his Louisville Slugger With Piglet before he was three. There're others who've taken that tack Was hit with a panic attack. Now I'm ninety, of screwing "Gad what is he doing?" New Shakespeare thing, "Romeo and Jack." Of Sis Chris I'd just like to say Would cruise in his own special way. The tools that I use "Your screws have come loose!" And ease through a loving soiree.

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.