Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

So truly, we had a fine chain.
When somehow you don't have a brain.
He watered them lots
Or little green spots
And strike Bush to reveal his disdain.
You hear all those screams from George Hurst?
Of typists whose lips are all pursed.
Has seats commodious
Or a PAAARRP most melodious?
And then very suddenly he burst.
The Papal Bull I thought was neat
He had indeed heard of Travis's meat.
To prime the old pump
The "Dowager's Hump"
To vomit all over the street.
I for one would never balk
With a lady, I started to talk.
Fine head of hair!
Designed by Claude Pierre
To sound both like dove and like hawk.
Their squeals as I set them alight
That both precedes and follows the night.
He traveled so fast
My mate was aghast!
Bound to show me her beam, with delight.
Says Paddy, "What are you folks about?"
There are some, I'm afraid, who miss out.
Send the men to the back
To vibrate your crack.
And if pains will cause him to pout.
There was a young man from Melrose
Was wearing air tight pantyhose.
And when in a corner
Who lives down a corner
As in 8 or 9 figure portfolios.
When my heart is broken and blue
The press isn't bowing on cue.
He employed the rear seat
Hence I favor bare feet.
"I swear I'll always be Frank with you.'"
Why thank you! If all this is true.
My Darling: small waist beneath two
They shed more light
"You're the Kingfish, all right."
It's best to leave many than phew.
A worn-out old harlot named Mame
And people of art say the same.
Their mission: To hunt
All moldy in front.
"Don't suck when you blow it. That's lame!"

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.

This document (source) is part of Crummy, the webspace of Leonard Richardson (contact information). It was last modified on Saturday, June 16 2012, 13:42:54 Nowhere Standard Time and last built on Saturday, May 26 2018, 15:35:34 Nowhere Standard Time.

Crummy is © 1996-2018 Leonard Richardson. Unless otherwise noted, all text licensed under a Creative Commons License.

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