Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

Michael Shannon is the tallest kid.
Could twist himself up like a squid.
"Is that six I hear?"
He would ram in his ear
Just the scent of which blows his whole lid.
The crew of the Enola Gay
She's like a harmonium play.
He was perfectly sure
Let's let love endure.
"Tenor twelve miles away."
The mohel just couldn't decide
And noticed how from hin you shied.
He steadily regales
(Especially males)
Then cooked it for me (gag) deep fried.
They say it was Copilot Falk
That I started when first I could talk.
The Captain was drunk
He said, "Just blew a chunk."
When he saw what was left of my stalk.
There was a young lecher named Lapp
About maples and why we must tap.
Once again this year.
For you should have kept clear
To withdraw without spilling my sap.
A rabbi is now quite a hero.
His ratings diminish to zero.
"Do you mean birds and bees"
That will ever please
His part played by Robert DeNiro!
Ophelia endeavored to sing
And baring her may a brood bring.
Monday morn, the car pool's
And rejected the tools.
The spaghetti was more like old string.
A helicopter pilot named Danny
There is no contour line to her fanny.
But how they endure!
No way to be sure.
What they search for in each nook and cranny!
I had Anne Marie in my crib
Vegetarians can be very glib.
Hey, don't I know him?
Who wanted to swim
That collects on our dear baby's bib.
Said the host of this little soiree
Misogynist -- Andrew Dice Clay.
He's a different frenetic
If we got too athletic
But she said, "It's for piece that I pray."

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.

This document (source) is part of Crummy, the webspace of Leonard Richardson (contact information). It was last modified on Saturday, June 16 2012, 13:42:54 Nowhere Standard Time and last built on Monday, July 16 2018, 08:10:04 Nowhere Standard Time.

Crummy is © 1996-2018 Leonard Richardson. Unless otherwise noted, all text licensed under a Creative Commons License.

Document tree:
Site Search: