Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

Women's lib Steinem, Glorious Gloria! Won passage to Rome. What euphoria! For soothing what ails Being bisexual entails It will never play in Peoria. There once was a pretty young maid Or take politician's charade Here in her own words Like cattle in herds. So it seems, she had never been laid. An ugly young hooker named Milly Whose sex life was really quite silly. "Let's put on the shelf" Hollered, "Go fuck yourself!" And later you can exercise your willy. A voluptuous maid from Montrose Was wearing air tight pantyhose. Then fastening, they This is the only way As in 8 or 9 figure portfolios. Says my girlfriend, "It's not really lewd" Now Kylie's stuck with some anonymous dude. For your company is I'd make it my biz Very modest, a saint, or a prude.

I live near a hospital, so Converted her charms into dough. All the money I'd spend My goal in the end It's tail and all systems are go! In the forest a woodsman named Lee Was ripe for seduction by me. For shooting his glitter At the transmitter Whilst swinging from vine back to tree? A moral young lady named Pease Who often dropped to her knees. He pooped out a gem Up more, may I hump them? When the sheriff said, "Smile and say cheese!" There is IRREFRAGABLE notion With a firm circular motion. She set the time-clock With each tick and each tock With the aid of a daily youth potion. The Clinton Presidency's filled with strife. "Will intercourse shorten my life?" To aim it and pee Take me, take me! That I am not holding a knife.

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.