My Seussical Life for 2005 September

No, not of additional human beings. Our PC was causing us major headaches by crashing randomly, so we bought an iBook. We are now Mac users. And it feels like I've entered another dimention. How does this thing work?!

A long-standing hope is realized: yesterday Dave and I saw Garrison Keillor in the flesh. We thought we'd have to sojourn to St Paul to hear a broadcast of A Prairie Home Companion as part of our residence in the Midwest, but when Dave heard Keillor was coming to the Kansas State Fair back in May, he bought me tickets for Mother's Day (he also made me an NPR contributor, I might add). This show was such a wonderful pleasure! I was astonished to see all the unheard commotion that goes on behind what appears to be a seamless production over the radio. It was a special treat to be part of a Kansan audience; Keillor tapped into some of our social and political quirks and made great fun of them. Listen to the archive recording when it comes online and you might hear me chuckle, clap, or sing "Home on the Range" will all my Kansas neighbors.

Since we drove 3.5 hours to get to the State Fair in Hutchinson Kansas, we thought we'd better stay awhile after the show. We saw some animals and ate some Fair concessions. We ate the requisite something fried (battered cheese curds), something on a stick (a freshly battered corn dog--okay it was fried, too), and something dipped in butter (roasted corn with a dash of lemon pepper). We stood in a line for a deep fried Snickers, but decided enough was enough. We skipped the carnival rides for the sakes of our neighbors who watched the boys most of the day and were waiting up late for us to drive the 3.5 hours home. We had a wonderful time.

We drove the 18 hours straight each way to and from Utah last week to attend my grandfather's funeral. Driving, I cried listening to Dar Williams. This summer has been very difficult for me. I feel like I'm mourning my fractured family for the first time in my life, though I know it isn't the first time. It is just the first time I'm neck deep in parenthood and trying to sift through all the poor nurturing that went on when I was a child, trying to find any crumbs of good that I might want to use in caring for my small boys. I've been so angry at my father and mother. Somewhere in my mind my grandpa got lumped in with all that emotion, so I've disregarded him for the past five years. Sad to say, I didn't feel the loss of his death until after the funeral when I visited with family at Grandpa's apartment. I walked into his bedroom, smelled his scent mixed with Old Spice calogne, and realized I once was a little girl who adored her grandpa. But it is too late. Dead is dead. Live and learn, I guess.

Dave says I need to eat more ketchup :).

I love the Midwest. I love it for many reasons, but there is one special reason that comes to mind today. Each season is robust and true to it's character, the way an almanac says it should be. Today begins the change from summer to fall here in Lawrence. Rain is falling outside, and the day has been cool. Leaves are beginning to fall off the trees. I feel like snuggling up in a quilt and reading something by a Bronte sister, or by George Elliot. I've had a giant pot of black beans simmering all afternoon, and tonight I'm going to make a black bean and pumpkin stew. There was such a beautiful, organic pie pumpkin at the Merc on Monday, begging to leave in my cart. I've been waiting for a true fall day to enjoy the festive vegetable. Today is that day.

Poor Dave. He has spent the last two nights in his office on campus working on statistical models and writing papers. Here I am, awake at 5:00 am on a Saturday morning with an empty space next to me in my bed. Poor, poor Dave. I've often joked about sending a sleeping bag and Thermarest for napping on desparate nights like these. Even a short sleep might really improve his efforts at this point.

Today was Atticus' six-month post-operation evaluation with our orthopedic surgeon. Dr. Anderson was absolutely pleased with Atticus' recovery following the heel cord transfer surgery he received in April. The best news of all is that Atticus has no need for his brace anymore! Atticus has been wearing an “ankle foot orthosis” for over three years. When he heard Dr. Andersen pronounce the happy news, he threw his arms around my neck and hollered a big "yipee!" I'm so glad his progress has been such that the AFO is no longer a necessary part of his daily life. It was a cumbersome thing, but very helpful and vital to getting Atticus where he is today.

I've just finished reading Jane Eyre today. All last week I was suffering on the couch with the worst cold, but enjoying immensely Charlotte Bronte's novel. Then Atticus became ill with the same fevered, achy sickness, and it was easy to continue reading. The book was spellbinding. I think that being sick and sleeping poorly contributed to this feeling. I like to think my sleepless condition paralleled Jane Eyre's, though on very different grounds. First, Atticus needed attention in the night because of his cold. He needed Ibuprofen, a cool washcloth on his forehead--even had delirious dreams (he was convinced Samuel had left the house and gone to the neighbors). Then, with that phase of night-wakings over, Samuel had a mishap with his soother that gave us opportunity to get rid of the thing altogether. So Samuel spent a restless night getting over the deprivation of his plastic comforter (this is a blog entry in itself--the process of weaning an almost three-year-old of a pacifier).

Anyway, now that the novel is over for me, I'm a little sad. I feel like I'm cut off from some friend that has become important to me. I feel as if I've spent a good deal of time with Jane Eyre, visiting on the living room couch and over lunch, talking late into the night about Mr. Rochester like friends do (Dave has been away for every evening for the last week and a half, at least). Now I have to find a new friend to keep me company.

My friends, Dave leaves this morning for a Public Managment Research Association conference in LA. This conference has been the reason for his recent crunch; he's been gathering data, developing statistical research models, and writing a paper so he is a prepared little presenter at this very important conference. He has been working very hard. Anyway, our iBook will be going with him, so I won't have easy access to a computer until he gets back on Sunday evening. Here's to academic conferences, and I'll post again when I have the chance.