Spam As Folk Art for 2005 October

Der sur, I wis 2 applie 4 yor posishun az teechur of inglish.

But I need more time!

Shipped direct from Yuggoth.

No, I'm wasting my life making fun of spam.

Only a $40 copay on each miracle.

It IS, I tell you!

As do all moments.

Once again, the Kalamazoo Earthworms take the title!

That's a common reaction.

Pick me! Pick me!

You see, you had the ammunition all along! You just had to believe in your own firepower!

What kind of weird Blade Runner business are you running?

"Honey, I've decided to actuate our relationship and proactively show initiative by gifting you with this Rolex."

I guess that would be a good use for a replica of myself.

Ransom notes delivered by spam.

I'll do anything, just don't hurt my commercial loans!

A pharamcy is to a pharmacy what a banc is to a bank.

If the creation of Israel were to happen today.

Hell, I'll be his neighbor.

Never before has so much passive voice been crammed into a single spam. Thrill as things happen all by themselves!

I'll tell you when I've had enough!

An excellent point.

Featuring the hit song "The message cannot be represented in 7-bit ASCII encoding."

The competition was fierce, but I think the judges made the right choice.

I'm too uncoordinated to move only one of my eyes!

When alchemists spam.

No, the label's on the other side!

When you experience erectile dysfunction on the high seas, check out our Pharrgmacy.

I like how the spam-thesaurus has revived all the obsolete ways we used to envision online shopping. Next: the return of gopher?

I knew it would pay off to call my act "The Aristocrats"!

But it was too late. Stevens was gone, buried beneath an innovative wave of specially priced tablets.

Ask Specimen oDFvi3 where he left the hammer.

They're next.

I've only got enough to cast Cure Light Toothache.

Users may experience some side effects.

Hulk smash.

Is "quibble" some kind of... slang for something? Like...

Uh.

You've got your account on my mail! (I am extrapolating cultural references I don't understand, second-hand, here. Is this funny, Leonard?) (Update: "Regrettably, it is not terribly funny.")

Curses, and just a week before my thesis was due to be published.

And a foot to the left, and in a different colour, and you've put the handles on upside-down.

Dispatch it with a sharp gardening fork before it grows to full size.

I knew I was forgetting something. And I've just been hanging up on them.

Quite right, they give their patients a prescription, generally.

I hate it as well. Shall we stop, and I'll just buy my pharmaceuticals over the counter?

It's almost as if you're using my bandwidth to distribute spam while I'm asleep.

Brine.

Cyanide.