Spam As Folk Art for 2004 December

• From: Corrosive Q. Malt -- What's your pleasure, squire?

  I think you mean "poison", guvnor.

• Your employer said they can't hire you because you don't have a deggree

  Also because they are already employing you. Please stop phoning them.

• Mosquito Incorporated   246 People Died From Mosquitoes

  Which as this next slide shows, signifies a very real 78% drop from our third-quarter average. I know most of us are dead in the winter, but malaria infection represents a 24-hour global marketplace, in the 21st century.

• nobody beats our prices on drugs

  Well, except people taking some of the stronger hallucinogens. But we wouldn't advise buying anything from them.

• In the body of some pharmaceutical spam: ...you can drive or mix alcohol drinks with them...

  Do not attempt to operate machinery or mix fruit smoothies, within eight hours of taking.

• Are you pimped with a Rolex watch?

  Are you quite sure you're using that verb correctly?

• Rolex Tattoo

  Shockproof, waterproof and it tells the right time twice a day.

• You are only 15 minutes away from amazing night of love!

  It's mid-afternoon. You really shouldn't have had that Rolex tattoo done, you know.

• call me at Rolex time

  Now, if only I had some sort of watch, I'd know when that was.

• You came without a

  --SONG, in your HEART

• she likes invading privacy

  Sorry, but the new attorney general has already been chosen.

• Knock, Knock. Who's There? Credit!

  ...okay, credit who?

• drill your girlfriend's hospital to the max

  But honey, the dowsing rod said there was oil on the grounds!

• S/o/f/t/w/a/r/e taking a bite out of your b/u/d/g/e/t? Try O/E/M!

  Spam recreates the look of those old Digital ads.

• Leonardr we added more wives Leonardr

  Still not enough wives for my tastes.

• Express your love to him,buy him A BMW Watch

  Or even better, buy him a BMW.

• im happy with this pain stuff

  Going after the lucrative masochist market.

• Don't cry daddy

  When spam tugs at the heartstrings.

• It's time to meet the new you!

  Sorry, human spammer, but you've been replaced by the SpamBot 3000.

• Excitement has found you! ^?Safe Sexual Affair^? Club

  I thought I could hide from excitement...

• Survey says your pen-is is small

  Well, I want a second opinion.

• FWD:Leonardr care to meet kally wacky

  I've always loved to meet local morning DJs!

• Leonardr Single as a one-dollar bill fewer

  HOW SINGLE was he?

• im glad i found it comedy beginner

  Yes, some open mikes are more friendly to new comics than others.

• Get your Bible Based Degree!

  I'm majoring in Deuteronomy.

• The best prices from Leonardr's Software on Demand Outlet,

  Come on down!

• Dirty sluts can make can make you rich see how here- chambers mantrap

  So according to the Spam Unified Theory of what does what: dirty sluts make you rich, even as footage ruins your life. Does this sound right?

Xorpheous
Xorphan
Xorpheu

• From: Sardine J. Geldings

  Gelding a sardine is a delicate operation!

• From: basil mcglory

  His mother was English, his father Scottish.

• my pain med1cat10n are killing me

  Now that's irony!

• We cannot get to those good feelings as long as this war is going on.

  Spam therapy.

• almost100%ofthosewhoinitiatedivorcelaterregrettheirdecision!thereis

  The Micro Machines pitchman turns to PSAs.

• Sports Illustrated : Don't you need someone to share your dreams with

  Yes, but Sports Illustrated is not that someone.

• Your consent is needed

  Why not simply manufacture it?

• girls eat pink

  Gender stereotyping now extends to food.

• Got trouble with your pickle ? %RDN_WORD %RDN_DIGIT

  Got trouble with your %RDN_PENIS_EUPHEMISM ?

• Now putting a price on youth?

  I was just playing around! I never meant to put a price on youth!

• Dreaming about a A watch

  That is one boring dream.

• Vioxx User Damages Estimated at $7billion

  Once upon a time, spam was advertising Vioxx. Now it's drumming up people for a class action suit. Have you no morals, spam? I expected better from you!

• Yes, man is mortal,

  Thanks to the price I put on youth!

• Tupac prefers Rolex, Cartier and Breitling

  From beyond the grave, he endorses selected bling.

• interesting medical tip :learn how to violate

  I'm trained in CPR and in, uh, violation.

• Cross th border without leaving your house!

  When you live in scenic International Falls!

• pain is killing your mother

  And you never call, you never write...

• you have not lived until you have tried the blue pill

  The latest Matrix advertising campaign.

• Get popular hard to find medications here

  We don't stock that anymore. It kept selling out.

• Myth Shattering Behaviour by Celebrities

  You mean little Mikey's head didn't actually explode?

• Sarah how could you do this to me?

  Well, for starters, I'm not Sarah.

• I came to make you money

  Investment Opportunity From Another Planet

• my doggies fetch crabs

  Whatever you're selling, nobody's buying.

• New Year with Vicodin Mario

  It's-a me! Coked-up Mario!

• save your sickness

  If you'll just sneeze into this jar...

• Santa and Wife Says Ho ho Ho hO!

  What are they hiding?

• This is insane leonardr!

  A SIDJFAF RGIJERGRDLK BDFNBLSG RR! Thanks! I'm here all week!

• RE:Porno riches make you rich- ca glottal

  As do any other kind of riches.

• Is it A Micro Cap Miracle?

  When CNN Money does Christmas specials

• Start your own vending route!

  Wow, that sounds... not fun at all

• What's for christmas?

  Apparently Christmas is a meal.

• medical essay : dont ignore your cerebral pain

  Confront the angst!

• Get rich in one minute

  Whoa! I can't handle that kind of up-front investment!

• Vicodin - only now Ginger

  For a cultural creative's pain and fun.

• You don't want to spend christmas alone ? We got the solution

  Wait! My family! That's it!

• The gut has to go

  Will you be performing the antrectomy yourself, doctor?

• Catastrophic Christmas sale

  I've been to those.

• Sara will do you in the theater

  I guess that answers Alanis Morisette's question

• in canadian pharm we trust

  I pledge allegiance...

• important news about when you die

  No spam subject line has ever let me down more.

• Disgusting Movie of Important Women

  The new book of short stories from David Foster Wallace.

• Stop Paying For Your Pay-Per-View Movies Sports

  Alternatively, stop viewing them.

• wipe out all proof

  Leave no witnesses! Happy holidays, folks!